An Olivia Newton John Moment

Funny how ideas for a blog can change overnight, literally. I had intended to write a blog about sex education and abortion, but after last night's dream, I changed my mind. Don't be fooled by the title of this blog, it actually is difficult to write and challenges me greatly to play the "truth or dare" thing and really be the personification of "faith unfiltered."

My blogs for the most part have been about things that I think ultimately can hinder the cause of Christianity and turn off those outside the faith community. I feel it is better to be real with the "world" so to speak, even air dirty laundry from time to time, rather than put up a united front to showcase our piety even if it is just surface stuff that may in time come crashing down like a house of cards.

For this blog I write about me...."being real" and open myself up to things that hopefully may resonate with others who are just part of the human family. And this I think is so important to do; show myself as a Christian in the broader context of being part of the human family. I'm sure many men and to a lesser degree women can identify with "checking out" members of the opposite sex. I, for one will never fail to miss a "bubble butt" or "quite a rack" that passes by even if I am busy doing other things. And like I said, the ladies I'm sure do this as well when some good "eye candy" passes their way. I believe for the most part people understand this and don't get overly judgmental about sexual beings checking out "hot" looking or just attractive people.

Of course this happens to married folks just as often as single, available people, and because of this, the subject of "looking but not touching" may get dicey if you mention to others that this is no big deal. But I as a married person am going to touch upon a far more provocative subject than just looking, one that is about feeling and connection that is "dicey' to say the least but one that I feel I need to tell.

I have had at least 4 (what I would call crushes) with other women since I have been married. These have been far away longings so to speak, with the objects of my affection having no idea of how I felt. I think these crushes had lots to do with the difficulties of married life; being so familiar with another person is not always such a good thing if you get my meaning. You can be married to someone, love them, and at the same time they may drive you to drink on occasion...lol! But whatever the thing that may cause a married man or woman's hear to stray doesn't really matter. The fact is sometimes you meet someone who is the "cat's meow", "all that and a bag of chips", whatever phrase captures you best.

I had a dream last night about someone who really is "putting an added skip to my step." I just was dreaming about walking with her on a shady road full of trees off to the side, and just by being with her and enjoying her company, life seemed so much like a glass of lemonade on a warm, spring day. I bring this up because this person may know herself oh so well, know her flaws, sin struggles, the things that hinder her from having the wonderful relationships that she longs for, yet I can see in her in the way that she longs to be seen. This is so rare and people need to hear that when the opportunity arises.

Thinking about an Olivia Newton Song years back, one line i particularly like is..."I'm not trying to make you feel uncomfortable, I'm not trying to make you feel anything at all, but this feeling doesn't come along everyday." Those special feelings that you have towards another member of the human family are so important to express even if one worries about "the so-called slippery slope" of maybe hurting a marriage. There is no reason to believe that telling someone how you feel about them is going to lead you to be obsessed with pursuing a relationship with them when you know it can and should not happen. This is the same as fearing enjoying pleasure means you will turn into a hedonist and end up being on nude beaches in Jamaica. God is a good shepherd who watches over His flock and will not let them go too far astray.

A couple of months ago I was leaving work, tired from another mundane afternoon and the battle scars of life in this world, when I stopped at a traffic signal. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed a girl in a car to the right of me. She had a friend in the passenger seat who was punching her, looking all red and what appeared to be embarrassed. The driver was speaking to me and though I couldn't hear her, I was able to read her lips. She was saying, "She likes you," all the while this girl was banging on her shoulder furiously like a school girl who doesn't want the friend to tell the boy of a secret crush. I bring this up because, though in a way I found the incident amusing, my very being felt so so good. And even though I know myself all to well, for a moment I felt like "I was all that and a bag of chips" and boy did it feel nice. I hope by sharing a dream and telling someone when you have the feelings that don't come along everyday...that others can sure feel nice.